Writing About Brexit: When Boris Johnson Became Prime Minister

On 24th July this year, Boris Johnson became Prime Minister.

Due to a job that ate up a lot of my hours, I had not been blogging here: but in August, as things turned both weird and strange and complicated in UK politics around Brexit, I began clarifying things for myself by writing longer and longer posts on Facebook, initially just for my friends and then later as public posts as friends asked if they could share or link to them.

After a few weeks, a friend contacted me and said that he would like to be able to thank me for my work explaining Brexit shenanigans to him more clearly than any other source had been able to: and did I have a tipjar or something?

Well, I didn’t.

But I thought about it, and realised that I was squeezing these FB posts into short spaces of time between work and sleep, and it would be great to be able to clear some hours to listen to Parliamentary debates in real time, factcheck, and write about Brexit without one eye on the clock getting ready to leave for work.

So I accepted his kind suggestion, set up a Ko-Fi site, and asked people who were reading my Facebook posts, if they found them useful and if they could spare the money, to buy me a coffee.

Another friend contacted me, after a busy week in October, to ask if I would post these Facebook writings somewhere he could more easily link to them. And I thought: I should go back to this blog.

I’m about to post, backdated to the day I posted them on FB, all of the Brexit for coffee essays I’ve written since August.

All of them will for convenience be tagged Brexit for Coffee, as well as other more rational tags.

I will in future try to keep this blog better updated.

And here’s a poem I adapted for Boris Johnson on 23rd July:

Disobedience
(Not quite by A. A. Milne)

Alexander
Boris Johnson
de Pfeffel de Pfeffel de
Took great
Care of his Brexit
Though he was only three.
Boris Boris
Said to his Brexit,
“Brexit,” he said, said he;
“You must never slow steal to the end of no deal, if
you don’t slow steal with me.”

Boris Boris
Johnson’s Brexit
Put on a golden spiel,
Boris Boris
Johnson’s Brexit
Drove to the end of no deal.
Boris Boris
Johnson’s Brexit
Stereotypically:
“I’ll easy slow steal to the end of no deal and prorogue in time for tea.”

John Bercow
Put up a notice,
“LOST or STOLEN or STRAYED!
BORIS BORIS
JOHNSON’S BREXIT
SEEMS TO HAVE BEEN MISLAID.
PARLIAMENT
LOST TORY MAJORITY
HISTORICAL RECORD
HE TRIED TO SLOW STEAL TO THE END OF
NO DEAL – TOTALLY UNTOWARD!

Alexander
Boris Johnson
(Commonly known as Al)
Told his
Conservative Party
Not to go blaming him.
Boris Boris
Said to his Brexit,
“Brexit,” he said, said he,
“You must never slow steal to the end of no deal with-out consulting me.”

Boris Boris
Johnson’s Brexit
Hasn’t been heard of since.
John Bercow
Was not sorry,
Nor was Corbyn or Liz.
Queen Liz
(Somebody told me)
Said to a man she knew:
“When lying bastards become Prime Minister, well, what can anyone do?”

(Now then, very softly)

Alexander
Boris Johnson
de Pfeffel

is a sentimental
incremental
transcendental

lying bastard not fit to be Prime Minister.

1 Comment

Filed under Blog Housekeeping, Brexit

One response to “Writing About Brexit: When Boris Johnson Became Prime Minister

  1. “Brexit for Coffee”? Careful how you say it (or was that the point?)

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